Antics in Babysitting Continue

I figured today would run a bit smoother as I had a heart to heart with the child this morning and she apologized this afternoon for her behavior on Monday. Well, we get home and she's playing with her doll house. I can't even pretend to try to play dolls. I'm such a boring playmate when it comes to anything creative. As she's playing, she toots. Now, one couldn't really be sure of what they heard and I usually just ignore situations like that, ESPECIALLY with small children. If she hadn't jerked her head around to look at me and giggle, the whole thing could have passed innocently enough. Well about a minute later she jumps up and runs to the bathroom (mind you we haven't been home 15 minutes and she went as soon as we got there). So, I was a bit concerned: "You okay?" "Yeah, I'm just pooping," was the response she hollered across the house. Good to know, I don't think deductive reasoning would have provided that information. A few minutes later she's calling my name...oh lord. She wants me to wipe her. Excuse me?? I've changed diapers, wiped toddler's behinds, but a 7 year old second grader wants me to wipe her? I was a bit confused by this and told her no. "But it's really messy. You don't understand!" Oh, I get it, it's messy so I should get your poo all over me instead of you taking care of things. Well, I wasn't about to give in on this one. Her teachers don't wipe her, why should I have to.

Then it was back to play as normal until dinner time. She says she wants chicken nuggets, three. So I finally find the unmarked baggie amidst her mother's liquor in the freezer and pop the three requested into the microwave for a few seconds. They were plenty cooked and just fine. Well, this was an unacceptable form of preparation. They are SUPPOSED to be cooked in the toaster oven, I was informed. Well, excuse me. Then she proceeds to request that I feed her. Excuse me?? Again, 7 year old second grader. I don't think so. She fought for a few seconds before I walked away to utilize the facilities (I made sure to lock the door, you never know with this kid). By the time I returned, she was happily eating her wrongly cooked chicken on her own accord. However, she was eating with her mouth wide open, smacking at every bite. I was so disgusted and finally got her to chew with her mouth closed, repeating the words of my mother, again.

Her mom laughed so hard when she got home. I can't really remember how the conversation went, but it started somewhere around me not hand feeding her daughter. Then the girl decided to bust out with, "I went poopy!" Her mom just laughed at her and said okay. Then I told her that I had also refused to wipe her. Both being on the precedent that I felt she was certainly old enough to accomplish both. He mom, again, laughed and said that she'd gotten some babysitters to do both but that I didn't have to do either. She was still laughing when she walked me to the door and said under her breath, "this ought to be good birth control for you."

Seriously, I have babysat for years now. I've come across some interesting kids with some pretty odd quirks, but this child takes the cake. My mother is highly amused with my daily updates on the latest random behavior I've had to combat. Oy! I don't know if I'll make it all year with this child!